All alone.
I'm dead. [To people in photo.] You're dead. Look. A funeral. I'm holding a funeral in my hand. A dead history. A moment lost forever.
I can't feel anything. I can hear laughter. Outside. Pale vapours mocking me. Wreaths of smoke. I understand the languages of dead things.
I can see you. You're watching. Your spectral face. Dead. You never were alive. You pretended. You aped us living things. You were always too cold.
You don't exist. You're my imagination. Only I am. Only I. My hands. Pentadigital manipulators. I am a living breathing existing doubting homo sapien carbon-based sentient being. You are nothing.
STOP WATCHING ME! You don't exist! Stop whispering. Stop your tongue. Stop speaking. Ded sno fa way na chay kee ha la ba ma ta ra noh. Ba pa na. La ti ca tay, be re vee ta la ca ma na. STOP SPEAKING.
Turn on the lights! I want to go home. Home to my boat. Home before here. GO AWAY!
I want to eat breakfast cereal and watch the milk turn red. I want to slurp the milk and play with the bottom-box toy. I want my teddy bear. I want my daddy. No.
I want things to be different. I want my home! I want my family. I want to play loud music and bounce through my room. I want to play with my toes on the bottom of the upper bunk. I want to put my feet in the air. I want my brother to lie beside me in the dark and look at the glowing stars.
Do you remember that, Will? Laying together, hardly breathing? You kept looking at your hands, how empty they were.
Why did you have to jump, Will? They're laughing at you. I can hear them. Their voices, like metal pipes. There's nothing out there. THERE ISN'T ANYTHING. STOP IT!
What did you find out, Will? How do I make them stop? I can't do it, Will. I thought I could. I can't. What's out there, Will? What did you see? Where do I find Elvis? Where's Tobo? Who is the ticket-master and why isn't he here?
Why couldn't Mom and Dad continue? Why did they have to stop? Why couldn't they accept deceit and carry on? Nothing's happened. I don't believe anything has happened. I will wake up. Now.
STOP IT! Stop smiling. It's not true yet. You haven't won. Put your face back on. You can't fool me. I'm not listening. I don't hear your lisping whispers. I don't feel your tongue touch my ear. GO AWAY. STOP IT!
I want my family back. I want my destroyed homes. My boat in Moss Landing Harbor. I want to patch the fabric. I want my Dad to stop cuddling someone strange in the kitchen. I want things to stay the same.
NO! NOT FOREVER! I want things to change gradually. I want not to succumb. I want not to die unmoving. NO. I can feel your tongue. Ak nik no ma chee. A na the ma. Coor. A na te ma. NO! NOOOOOO!
[The blind rattles, and falls. The face of the blue man is in the window. Leering. Staring. Watching. Spectral.]
GO AWAY! I didn't summon you. Elvis, Tobo, ba ra me na. You can't fool me. Your gold lamé doesn't convince me. You don't come from Tobo. Not from the sacred waters. You came from Sumatra. Java. The jungle. The heat.
WHERE ARE THE LIGHTS! You don't exist. I killed you. I can hear you. Your hunger. The voices tell me. They say
ded sno fa way na chay kee. A la ba na ga. A la ba la ba a. A la ba te. Ba li ka li ma tan su la we si ti mor. A la ba la ba la ba te. A la ba la ba. A la ba la ba te.
I summon the ticket-master. I ask for his wife. I don't want you. Go away. Stop watching. Stop laughing. I know your name. Kyr ee la ba la ba ohs.
I'm scared. I'm scared. Go away. I'm scared.
[The phone rings. The blue man disappears. Chris jumps.]
No one is home. [Ring.] We're not here.
[The ringing stops.]
Who's out there? Who wants me? What do you want? Why do you want me?
GO AWAY AND LEAVE ME ALONE. I AM I. I EXIST. NOTHING ELSE DOES!
[The phone rings again.]
NO! [Ring.] WHO ARE YOU?
[The ringing stops.]
STOP MOCKING ME!
I can do it myself. I don't need anybody's help. Nothing's out there. Nothing exists but me.
[A single ring.]
OK. OKAY! I can't do it. Just trying. Just like Will. [The photo.] Just like my family. We can't. Look at us. LOOK! We've torn... our... family... to... SHREDS! [She tears the picture as she says it.]
What is it I'm looking for? What is it, Will? I can't do it myself.
[The phone rings. Chris snatches the receiver in defiance.]
[Into the phone.] WHAT?
What kind of preacher do you call yourself?
You're crazy. No. No. I don't have any. No.
[She hangs up the phone angrily, and...]